Episode 005: The Mistake Was Small
The Story You Told Yourself Was Not
What happens when one mistake feels much bigger than the mistake itself?
In this raw and unscripted conversation, Jane Newman and Kass explore what happens when making an error triggers self doubt, catastrophising and a harsh internal story about our own competence.
Kass shares a recent experience at work where incorrect data led her to question herself and worry about what others thought of her. Jane helps her unpack what actually happened, what she assumed had happened, and what evidence she was using to judge herself.
Together they explore:
• Why one mistake can quickly become “I did it all wrong”
• The difference between what actually happened and the story we tell ourselves about it
• How catastrophising can turn a small error into something that feels enormous
• Why being capable and competent doesn't mean getting everything right
• The pressure we can put on ourselves to respond immediately
• The difference between something being important and something being urgent
• How mistakes can affect us physically as well as emotionally
• Why reassurance from someone else isn't always enough when we're judging ourselves harshly
• What it means to create a safe space where people can make mistakes
• How our need to feel capable and competent can influence the way we respond to mistakes
• The idea of “emptying” and “refilling” your power cup
• Using emotional agility to identify what you're feeling and what might be underneath it
• Looking for evidence that challenges the story we've created about ourselves
• Why sometimes the best response to an email is to wait before replying
You made a mistake.
That doesn't mean you are a mistake.
It doesn't mean you're incompetent.
And it doesn't mean everyone else is judging you.
Sometimes we need to stop, look at the evidence and remind ourselves that we are still learning.